I know Justin is a year old, but it took me this long to finally get it all out. I just wanted to let everyone know how unpredictable life can be. I thought
I was an expert at having babies, I had it all planned out the third time around. My third pregnancy went smoothly, my c-section was scheduled, and I had my birth plan ready. I wanted to be in complete control of all aspects of the delivery, recovery, and time in the hospital. This was the plan: My c-section was scheduled for January 10th 2008 at about 7:30am. As soon as Justin was born, and I got back to the recovery room, I wanted to breastfeed him as soon as possible. No bottles allowed...no exceptions...lol! Since Gary had about a week off of work to care for us, I also wanted Justin to be in the hospital room with us and not at all in the nursery. I wanted to stay in the hospital as long as my insurance would let me, since mom was watching 
my other two boys. I just wanted to enjoy some time with Justin and Gary alone before we get back to the daily grind. I was so excited to have it all planned out and be in total control of my last pregnancy. Simple...right??WELL, let me tell you what really happened and how little control anyone has when a baby arrives. This is how it actually happened: We arrived at the hospital on time and all the paperwork was signed and ready to go. I got into the operating room, and got prepped for surgery. I was a bit scared, but that was normal. I was all numb, and feeling nothing. Gary by my side, we patiently waited to hear that little cry for the first time. The doctor called Gary over to witness his son being born, and he came back to my side with 
joyful tears in his eyes. It was so sweet. Justin Jacob Vukas was born at 8am, and weighed 6lbs. 11oz. Gary went with the doctors to clean and check the baby as they normally do. Then the door opened and I got my first look at my third little baby boy. He had a red, white, and blue knitted baby hat on, and wrapped like a burrito in his hospital blankie. He had dark hair and chubby little cheeks. Then the doctor said he was a little concerned with the way he was breathing, and that they would just have to watch him for a bit. I thought that was normal, and I had to get my tubal and get stitched back up anyway. I figured that was enough time for them to keep an eye on him. So, I gave him an itty bitty kiss and off he went. I got all 
stitched and sent back to recovery for a bit, with lots of meds. I remember lots of my family there coming in and out, and saying how beautiful the baby was. I was so full of pain medicine, I had no idea how much time had gone by or what even they were saying half the time. But as time ticked away that day, I still wasn't able to hold my son. I remember my brother was able to take a polaroid picture of him, and bring that to me. Justin had to be put under an oxygen hood because he wasn't breathing correctly. I finally was able to go and see him the next morning when I was able to stand up. It hurt like hell, but nothing was going to keep me from seeing my son. I just had to touch him and see him for myself. With much effort, I finally got up to the 
nursery. I wasn't able to hold him yet, but just seeing him was good. I was able to try and feed him my breastmilk through a tiny syringe, which he wasn't too fond of. In the next few days there were many trips to the nursery, and very little progress. After two days Justin was still not breathing any better, so he had to be transferred to the UMASS NICU. So, we were packing up two days before I even wanted to leave the hospital, and only two days after my c-section. We went to UMASS, 
which was about a half hour away. They set him up in the NICU overnight and we were only able to stay over with him for one night. We were given a room to stay in. It had a pull out thing that resembled a bed but it was hard as a rock and low to the floor. There was also a chair that almost reclined and I slept in that. I, of course, did not sleep at all since I was worried about how Justin was doing. And I was really unable to just get up and go to him without help because of my c-section. 
After the first night we were unable to stay at the hospital, so we were forced to commute back and forth each day. We would sit there by his side day after day, hour after hour. We would call family members to report his progress. It was days and nights of pumping my milk, midnight calls to the NICU, and two hours or more of driving each day and I was still not able to hold my son. Justin had something called TTN, which means he still had fluid left in his lungs from birth. We had to wait for his body to absorb the fluid and he was able to breath on his own before he could go home. Finally on the sixth day of his life, he wasn't under the hood anymore and I could hold Justin. I was finally able to breastfeed him, change his diaper, and do everything else that all the nurses were doing. After seven days in the NICU, we were finally on our way home. This is not what I imagined or planned for my last birth. But, the only thing that matters is that Justin was better and he was coming home...healthy!!! I don't know where I found the strength to keep up with the traveling and worrying and wondering, but it was magically there.
I was an expert at having babies, I had it all planned out the third time around. My third pregnancy went smoothly, my c-section was scheduled, and I had my birth plan ready. I wanted to be in complete control of all aspects of the delivery, recovery, and time in the hospital. This was the plan: My c-section was scheduled for January 10th 2008 at about 7:30am. As soon as Justin was born, and I got back to the recovery room, I wanted to breastfeed him as soon as possible. No bottles allowed...no exceptions...lol! Since Gary had about a week off of work to care for us, I also wanted Justin to be in the hospital room with us and not at all in the nursery. I wanted to stay in the hospital as long as my insurance would let me, since mom was watching 
my other two boys. I just wanted to enjoy some time with Justin and Gary alone before we get back to the daily grind. I was so excited to have it all planned out and be in total control of my last pregnancy. Simple...right??WELL, let me tell you what really happened and how little control anyone has when a baby arrives. This is how it actually happened: We arrived at the hospital on time and all the paperwork was signed and ready to go. I got into the operating room, and got prepped for surgery. I was a bit scared, but that was normal. I was all numb, and feeling nothing. Gary by my side, we patiently waited to hear that little cry for the first time. The doctor called Gary over to witness his son being born, and he came back to my side with 
joyful tears in his eyes. It was so sweet. Justin Jacob Vukas was born at 8am, and weighed 6lbs. 11oz. Gary went with the doctors to clean and check the baby as they normally do. Then the door opened and I got my first look at my third little baby boy. He had a red, white, and blue knitted baby hat on, and wrapped like a burrito in his hospital blankie. He had dark hair and chubby little cheeks. Then the doctor said he was a little concerned with the way he was breathing, and that they would just have to watch him for a bit. I thought that was normal, and I had to get my tubal and get stitched back up anyway. I figured that was enough time for them to keep an eye on him. So, I gave him an itty bitty kiss and off he went. I got all 
stitched and sent back to recovery for a bit, with lots of meds. I remember lots of my family there coming in and out, and saying how beautiful the baby was. I was so full of pain medicine, I had no idea how much time had gone by or what even they were saying half the time. But as time ticked away that day, I still wasn't able to hold my son. I remember my brother was able to take a polaroid picture of him, and bring that to me. Justin had to be put under an oxygen hood because he wasn't breathing correctly. I finally was able to go and see him the next morning when I was able to stand up. It hurt like hell, but nothing was going to keep me from seeing my son. I just had to touch him and see him for myself. With much effort, I finally got up to the 
nursery. I wasn't able to hold him yet, but just seeing him was good. I was able to try and feed him my breastmilk through a tiny syringe, which he wasn't too fond of. In the next few days there were many trips to the nursery, and very little progress. After two days Justin was still not breathing any better, so he had to be transferred to the UMASS NICU. So, we were packing up two days before I even wanted to leave the hospital, and only two days after my c-section. We went to UMASS, 
which was about a half hour away. They set him up in the NICU overnight and we were only able to stay over with him for one night. We were given a room to stay in. It had a pull out thing that resembled a bed but it was hard as a rock and low to the floor. There was also a chair that almost reclined and I slept in that. I, of course, did not sleep at all since I was worried about how Justin was doing. And I was really unable to just get up and go to him without help because of my c-section. 
After the first night we were unable to stay at the hospital, so we were forced to commute back and forth each day. We would sit there by his side day after day, hour after hour. We would call family members to report his progress. It was days and nights of pumping my milk, midnight calls to the NICU, and two hours or more of driving each day and I was still not able to hold my son. Justin had something called TTN, which means he still had fluid left in his lungs from birth. We had to wait for his body to absorb the fluid and he was able to breath on his own before he could go home. Finally on the sixth day of his life, he wasn't under the hood anymore and I could hold Justin. I was finally able to breastfeed him, change his diaper, and do everything else that all the nurses were doing. After seven days in the NICU, we were finally on our way home. This is not what I imagined or planned for my last birth. But, the only thing that matters is that Justin was better and he was coming home...healthy!!! I don't know where I found the strength to keep up with the traveling and worrying and wondering, but it was magically there. 
0 comments:
Post a Comment